


Our Kitchen

by kakifuarika



Series: 30 days of OTP challenge [9]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: 30 days of OTP challenge, Alternate Universe, Destiel - Freeform, M/M, This is a little sad, day 9: cooking together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-24
Updated: 2014-06-24
Packaged: 2018-02-06 01:18:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1839136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kakifuarika/pseuds/kakifuarika
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean reminisces the times they cooked in their little kitchen. He remembers the way Castiel laughs, the way he looks, his smell… everything. It left an aching whole in his heart but he needs to begin his healing process. Dean needs to move on and start cooking again. Castiel would love that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Our Kitchen

**Author's Note:**

> This is in Dean's POV so yeah. Just a short one-shot because I was too busy watching Sebastian Stan in Political Animals. 
> 
> 30 days of OTP. Day 9: cooking together.

_Hey Cas,_

_I started cooking again today. It’s been a long time since I’ve used our kitchen and the oven doors are getting a little rusty. I figured it was about time I started cooking to avoid eating unhealthy fast food. You always scolded me because I ate too many take-out meals._

_I cooked a simple roast beef for one, it could’ve been for two but you weren’t there._

_I remember you used to watch me cook our meals in our little apartment. You always sat in the exact same spot with that amused expression and intent gaze until one time I pulled you into the kitchen and we started cooking together._

_Pizza! That was the first thing we cooked together. We made a mess of the kitchen, flour and other ingredients all around, but we had fun. The pizza was good .though_

_After that, you seem really interested in cooking that you even printed out a couple of recipes you wanted to try. I remember that I was the one who loved to cook but you seemed more enthusiastic about it that I did._

_It became our favorite past time besides TV marathons and sex (the latter being the most favourite)._

_I miss it though._

_I miss our impromptu food fights in the kitchen while we cooked. We were trying to make pie that day because I loved pie but instead we ended up throwing dough at each other from across the kitchen._

_I miss having sex with you in that kitchen. We tried making chocolate mouse and you spilled melted chocolate over me. You decided to clean me up sexily and I ended up banging you on the counter._

_I miss your laugh, your smile, your bright blue eyes, and your husky voice when you call out my name._

_I just wish you were still here man. The kitchen feels empty without you._

_By the way, Sammy brought Cassandra last week for a visit. She’s 4 years old now. The time certainly does fly. I remember when she was just a newborn and we visit Jess in the hospital. You got to hold her in your arms and caressed her gently like she was your own._

_You could have been a great father. We could’ve adopted our own kid. I would come home from work and find you in the kitchen while our son or daughter would be assisting you. We could take the weekend off and spend it at Bobby's. He'd love to have a kid that he_ _could treat as his grandchild. He or she would love to play with Jo in one of Ellen's get-togethers. It would've been awesome having a family with you._

_Cassandra loved the kitchen as much as you did. Cass (yes that’s what we call her) insisted on baking cookies and Sam knows I don’t use the kitchen anymore after… well it’s kind of sad to deny the kid on baking so I helped her out. We made a batch of warm chocolate chip cookies._

_Being in the kitchen after a year, it feels different._

_I know you’re probably asking why I decided to use it again and I know you already know why but I’m telling you anyways. It was one of my moments alone with Cass because Sam had to answer a business call. She asked me why I didn’t cook or bake anymore and I told her because you weren’t there to do all that cooking with me. You know what she told me?_  
  
“That’s a shame, Uncle Dean! You and Uncle Cas loved this kitchen and he would be sad to see you not use it. The oven’s even a bit rusty. Uncle Cas would’ve wanted you to cook again. He wouldn’t want to see you sad like this.” 

_And I swear to God that kid knocked some sense into me._

_I started cooking again after that. She was right though. The kitchen had been so unused for a year that it needs a little repair and some cleaning. I went to work right away, oiling up the oven doors and scrubbing the tiles clean._

_There was something else too._

_Yes, I still miss you and yes, it still hurts but when I remember all our good times in that kitchen, the pain goes away. I hear your laugh, I feel your touch, and I see your loving blue eyes. Sometimes I think you’re still there, in that exact same spot, watching me as I cooked our meals._

_Wherever you are, I hope you also have a kitchen and I hope you think of me when you cook your own meals._

_I look forward to the day we can cook by each other again (I just hope it doesn’t come too soon)_

_Loving and missing you terribly,_

_Dean._

I proceeded took out the piece of paper from my pocket as I walked towards his gravestone. It’s been a year since cancer took him from me but I always wrote him letters that I hope he somehow reads. Cassandra told me to burn the letters so it would go straight to heaven; it was some kind of heavenly postal service or something. That’s exactly what I did every time I visited Cas with a letter in hand.

I took out my zippo lighter and let the letter burn on the grass beside his gravestone. I watched the breeze raise the ember up into the air.

Maybe it was some kind of holy postal service and maybe Castiel is somewhere up there smiling down at me.

My grumbling stomach interrupted the serene moment. It must have been hours past my last meal and I can’t continue on low fuel. 

I think I’m going to cook again tonight.


End file.
